October 5, 2009

Let the "E" GO!

Maybe you're going to have to do some stuff YOU DON'T LIKE or FEEL is BENEATH YOU.

LIKE wake up in the morning OR answer the phone.

AND Maybe you're going to have to SAY and DO things that are ANNOYING and FRUSTRATING.

LIKE work or talk to people.

WELL MY PEOPLE, IT'S NOT THAT BAD !
THAT'S JUST YOUR eGO. AND ALL IT'S DOING IS GETTING IN YOUR WAY.
TRYING TO "HOOK YOU" WITH IT'S YUMMY BAIT.
do not take the bait... do not even nibble at it.

LET THAT eGO GO!

WAKING UP or as some call it, BEING AWAKE, isn't SO bad, and what if that phone call is from a RICH PERSON trying to give you some FREE MONEY!

AND Lots of people work, and sometimes at WORK they talk and SAY things.
Things that MIGHT help you find a way to make some QUICK MONEY so you can quit said job.

ALL I'm saying is GIVE THE eGO a rest and SHOW UP FOR LIFE!

'CAUSE SOMETHING GOOD MIGHT COME OUT OF IT: YOU MIGHT END UP WITH ENOUGH MONEY
TO GO BACK TO BED AND UNPLUG THE PHONE.
OR NOT.

AT LEAST YOU WONT BE RULED BY YOUR OLD STORIES AND 8 TRACK TAPES ,THAT PLAY IN YOU MIND,
AND THE REACTIONS THEY CAUSE.
yOU OR THE MANIFESTATION OF YOU, WILL BE DOING STUFF AND NOT HANGING OUT ON THE STREET CORNER IN THE DANGEROUS NEIGHBORHOOD KNOWN AS YOUR MIND.
GIVE IT A TRY.
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE?
NOTHING.
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO GAIN?
EVERYTHING!
LOVE TO ALL YOUS GUYS AND GALS AND WHATEVER.
TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT TO BEAVER.

YOURCLAM

Posted by clamlynch at 10:12 PM

April 14, 2009

INNER-ROBOT

Let me ask you this question: Have you ever seen a robot walking down the street crying?

Have you ever gotten a late night phone call from a robot complaining about how bad his life is going?

NO! OF COURSE NOT.

Robots are not like me or you.
They don't get sad or feel rejected or fearful.

When i first came up with my dynamic INNER- ROBOT technique it was at the end of a particularly HARSH crying jag which consisted of much naked crying, weeping AND sobbing. as i was starting to come out of it and was looking for some underwear i noticed one of my toy robots just staring at me with his blank robot expression and cold lifeless robot eyes. i blew my nose and screamed "I WISH I WAS LIKE YOU MR. X -43!! I HATE YOU! YOU SELFISH LITTLE METAL JACKASS! WHY DONT YOU GO JOIN THE NEW STUPID ROBOT ARMY! THEY'RE RECRUITING JERKS LIKE YOU! HERE'S SOME BUS MONEY!" ,Which i threw at him with my opposite hand, like a small 4 year old girl might do.

Once i stopped screaming at the robot, i realized i was on to something:
ROBOT POWER!

In my seminars i explain how to place a small imaginary robot inside of your MIND, that you can go to in times of trouble.
20 to 50 people are already using this tool and by Sept. i'm sure it will be more like
230 or maybe even 535. don't be left out. "GO TO THE ROBOT!"

Posted by clamlynch at 10:08 PM

April 1, 2009

I FORGOTTED

Folks imagine my embarrassment when I realized I forgot to post /publish my last blog-a-log entry which stated, "I was going to take a vow of silence and also a dramatic cut back in my food consumption, if I didn’t receive a check for the amount of $15,750.98 dollars from some sponsor or fancy pants highfalutin big wig of some major company"

Well as I sat locked in my home, silently waiting for the mailman and slightly hungry; to be honest with you I got a little bored and went for a walk. Now people let me tell you a little something about going on a little walk. First off if you decide to go on a little walk you should stick with a plan or time frame for said walk. Also you should have at least a general idea where you’re going to walk to.

Because that is EXACTLY WHAT I DID NOT DO.

I went off all silent and hungry and loosy goosy, aimlessly wandering into the woods and I learned a few things:

1. If you’re on any type of medication and you just take off for god knows where, you SHOULD BRING YOUR MEDICATION WITH YOU.

2. If you wear glasses and have night blindness with out them, then WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU LEAVE THEM AT HOME? ESPECIALLY WHEN YOUR SPONTANEOUS ILL PLAN WALK STARTS AT 7:25 PM!!

3. Maybe bring your wallet with some money in it and maybe some form of I.D.

There are so many other lessons in this tale, like wearing shoes, eating some food before you leave or perhaps bring a snack? A jacket? A map? OH MY GOODNESS GRANNY! The lists goes on and on.

Because folks , I DO NOT what happened to ME , to happen to YOU.
And that's called helping others and it feels GREAT!

I’m not going to go into too much detail because it would take too many WORDS, (Maybe I will put out a little pamphlet or something?) but lets just say after wandering in the woods aimlessly for a couple of days I was finally rescued by a group of wee folks led by a wizard,(which actually turn out to be several forest rangers and a state trooper) and after a short stay in the county hospitals “quiet room" I was returned home .

The experience has had a profound effect on me and now I’m more focused and motivated to HELPING OTHERS, with or without $15,750.98 dollars. Because something happening to me out there as I was sitting on a rock crying and eating some grass. It was a voice and it said, "You are on the right path , just stick with it and don’t give up". It also said, "Stop eating that grass there's a whole field of blueberries right behind you".

So I AM back.
Walking on my friends.
Walk on.
DO NOT LOOK BACK IN anger.
Blessings and stuff.

LoveALL Clam

Posted by clamlynch at 9:30 PM

February 14, 2009

HAPPY VALENTIMES!!

DEAREST READER,
HELP ME.
HHHHELP ME, I THINK I'M FALLING, IN LOVE AGAIN.
YES FRIENDS, I AM FALLING IN LOVE.
I AM IN LOVE, WITH LOVE.

IT'S VALEN-TIMES DAY!!!!

I KNOW IT'S NOT SPELLED THAT WAY...
IT'S VALENTINES DAY OR VALENTINUSOR IF SPEAKING OF THE NUMEROUS CHRISTIAN MARTYRS NAMED VALENTINE OR IT'S ASSOCIATION WITH "THE CIRCLE OF GEOFFREY IN THE HIGH MIDDLE AGES. OR ESTHER HOWLAND ,THE MONEY GRUBBING WITCH RESPONSIBLE FOR THE COMMERCIALIZATION AS WELL AS THOSE BASTARDS AT HALLMARK OH.... BLA,BEE,BA,BLA,BLA....

I AM LOOSE'N THE LOVE VIBE.....

OH DEAREST READER,
LOVE THAT I LOVE , LOVE.
PUT MY LOVE INSIDE YOU.
NOW, I GOT YOU SMILING,BECAUSE GUESS WHAT?
YOU'VE JUST BEEN BITTEN BY THE LOVE BUG AND WE'RE GOING TO RIDE THIS LOVE BUGGY TILL ITS LEGS FALL OFF!

NOW FRIEND , I AM, IN MOST LIKELIHOOD, NOT YE NEIGHBOR BUT COULD YOU LOVE THEE ANY WAY?

OH, JUST STOP THINKING ABOUT IT ,AND LOVE ME UNTIL YOU CAN LOVE YOURSELF , OR ELSE YOUR GOING TO BE STANDING AT THE STATION YELLING
"KERMIT ON A STICK !!"
AS YOU WATCH THE LOVE TRAIN, CHUG-A-LUG'N AWAY AND YOUR NOT ON IT.

OH GOOD PEOPLE , I AM SORRY, TO WHIP OUT THE OL'TOUGH LOVE ON YA ...STRIKE THAT !!
I AM NOT SORRY!
BECAUSE, LOVE IS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOUR SORRY.

LOVE IS MANY THINGS,
LOVE IS...OH I DON'T KNOW, YOU FILL IN THE BLANKS,
MAYBE IT'S A Q TIP DEEP IN YOUR EAR?
MAYBE A PINT OF ICE/JOY CREAM?
PRECIOUS MOMENTS?
MAYBE IT'S A VIBRATION OR A SENSATION FROM ANOTHER DIMENSION?
MAYBE IT SURPASSES ALL HUMAN UNDERSTANDING?

MAYBE IT'S A MOTHERS LAUGHTER?

"NOT SARCASTIC LAUGHTER OR LAUGHING AT YOU, AT YOUR SO CALLED , CRAZY HOPES AND DREAMS OF MAKING A LIVING AT HELPING PEOPLE WHEN YOU CANT EVEN HELP YOURSELF OR EVEN HOLD A REAL JOB DOWN FOR MORE THEN A WEEK!!!!"

WHATEVER!

WHERE WERE WE ?
AH YES, LOVE.
WHAT DOES LOVE ASK FOR IN RETURN?

I DON'T KNOW, BUT I HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY THAT IT'S FREE!

NOW, WITH THE PRICE OF GAS AND FOOD AND CIGARETTES THESE DAYS,
THAT SOUNDS LIKE A SWEET DEAL!

FOLKS, I HOPE I AM NOT LOSING YOU HERE BUT IF I AM, THAT'S OK.
BECAUSE, IT'S BETTER TO HAVE LOVED PEOPLE ( PEOPLE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW OR HAVE NEVER SEEN OR TALKED TOO OR PERHAPS, ARE NOT EVEN READING THIS ,WHICH IS KINDA IMPOSABLE IF YOU JUST READ THAT.)
THEN TO NEVER LOVED AT ALL.

GOSH, NOW I DON'T WANT TO SLEEP I JUST WANT TO KEEP ON LOVING YOU/ME.

BUT THE LIGHTS HAVE GONE DOWN IN THE CITY AND I AM TIRED.
SO I MUST RETIRE FOR THE EVENING AND DREAM MY DREAMS OF LOVE, WITH THE ONE I'M WITH (WHICH HAPPENS TO BE MYSELF)

GOODNIGHT DREAM LOVERS,
FREE YOUR LOVE!
YOURS,CLAM

Posted by clamlynch at 7:37 PM

February 10, 2009

LOG ON TO LIFE.

FRIENDS, I KNOW WE ALL WANT TO LOG ON TO LIFE.
WE ALL WANT TO BE CONNECTED.
TO BE ON-LINE WITH THE WORLD.

BUT THE PROBLEM/OPPORTUNITY SEEMS TO BE FINDING THE RIGHT PASSWORD AND THEN REMEMBERING SAID PASSWORD.

WELL MY VIRTUAL FRIENDS,
LET ME DOWNLOAD SOME INFO TO YOU, WHICH MIGHT BE HELPFUL... OR NOT.

WHEN COMING UP WITH A PASSWORD, FIND ONE THAT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD, THAT SPEAKS TO YOU, TO YOUR TRUTH, ONE THAT FEELS RIGHT TO YOU.

BECAUSE NO ONE CAN COME UP WITH A PASSWORD FOR YOU EXCEPT YOU.

YOU CAN READ AND STUDY ALL ABOUT PASSWORDS. YOU CAN FOLLOW PEOPLE AND SO CALLED PASSWORD GURUS AND TEACHERS WHO SAY THEY KNOW THE PASSWORD AND IF YOU WANT IT, YOU MUST DO AND ACT IN THE WAY THEY TELL YOU TO AND READ AND SAY AND BELIEVE WHAT THEY BELIEVE, SIGN UP FOR SOME OF THEIR CLASSES, ATTEND THEIR EXPENSIVE RETREATS AND ALSO GIVE THEM SOME OF YOUR HARD EARNED CASH. THEN AND ONLY THEN, JUST MAYBE, IF YOU’RE REALLY LUCKY, THEY’LL TELL YOU THE SECRET.

THE SECRET PASSWORD THAT WILL CHANGE EVERYTHING.

WELL BELIEVE IT OR NOT (YOUR CHOICE)
YOUR PASSWORD IS ALREADY INSIDE YOU.
YOU WERE BORN WITH IT.

YOUR PASSWORD IS AT HAND.

YOU JUST NEED TO BELIEVE IT.
GO INTO THE SECRET CLOSET OF YOUR MIND AND BE STILL AND LET IT COME.
IT WILL.

ASKING SOMEONE TO COME UP WITH A PASSWORD FOR YOU IS LIKE A FISH SWIMMING AROUND IN THE OCEAN LOOKING FOR WATER. ASKING EVERY OTHER FISH, IN A PANICKED FISH VOICE THAT WOULD PROBABLY SOUND VERY BUBBLY, "WHERE’S THE WATER! SOMEBODY HELP ME PLEASE! I MUST FIND WATER OR I WILL DIE!"

THE DIFFERENT FISH TELL HIM DIFFERENT THINGS AND PLACES TO GO TO FIND WATER AND SOMEONE TELLS HIM TO GO TALK TO THE WISE OL' FISH WHO HAS GREAT WISDOM AND INSIGHT AND THE WISE FISH SAYS, "IT IS SAID THAT MANY YEARS AGO THERE WAS WATER EVERYWHERE BUT THE FISH WERE BAD AND THE WATER WAS TAKEN AWAY, BUT IF YOU'RE A GOOD FISH AND DO GOOD FISH THINGS YOU WILL HAVE A LIFE FILLED WITH WATER, WHEN YOU DIE.”

SORRY CHARLIE.

POOR LITTLE FISH, UNABLE TO SEE HE IS SURROUNDED BY WATER, IT IS HERE IT IS NOW, IT IS UPON HIM.

I DON’T THINK A DOLPHIN WOULD ACT THAT WAY.
DOLPHINS ARE WAY TO SMART.
THEY’RE OPEN MINED AND FRIENDLY AND COOL AND SEXY....

ANYWAYS DEAR ONES,
ALL I AM SAYING IS FIND YOUR OWN PASSWORD PATH.

HERE’S A TIP, ONCE YOU FIND IT, DO NOT WRITE IT ON YOUR ARM, BECAUSE IF YOU'RE ANYTHING LIKE ME AND IT’S TIME FOR YOUR BI-MONTHLY SHOWER (WITH SOAP AND SHAMPOO) YOU ARE GOING TO BE IN FOR A SHOCK TO FIND YOUR PASSWORD HAS DISAPPEARED.

WRITE IT ON A PIECE OF PAPER AND THEN HIDE IT IN A SAFE PLACE.
THEN WRITE DOWN WHERE YOU HID IT AND HIDE THAT, JUST IN CASE.
THEN MAKE UP A LITTLE SONG ABOUT YOUR PASSWORD. MAYBE THE SONG SHOULD INCLUDE WHERE YOU HID THE PAPER YOU WROTE IT ON?

FEEL FREE TO PASS THESE WORDS ON... OR NOT.

LOVE,
USERNAME CLAMLYNCH
PASSWORD ******************

Posted by clamlynch at 11:22 AM

February 5, 2009

DO NOT BLOW IT.

THIS BUBBLE MAN T SHIRTS, FOR ONLY $I5 JUST MIGHT ATTRACT MONEY TO YOU...might.
THERES PLENTY MORE PRODUCTS THAT JUST MIGHT "SIMULATE YOUR PACKAGE" AT:
http://www.clamatees.com/

Posted by clamlynch at 8:49 AM

February 1, 2009

THERE'S SOMEONE AT THE DOOR, And they're looking for YOU.

YOU Hear the knocking.

SO WHY ARE YOU JUST STANDING THERE—SWEATING, HEART RACING, WITH YOUR BACK AGAINST YOUR DOOR?

MUMBLING TO YOURSELF.

HOPING WHOEVER IS OUT THERE WILL just GO AWAY.

PRAYING TO GOD THEY DON'T USE SOME KIND OF CRAZY MEDIEVAL BATTERING RAM TO BUST DOWN THE DOOR AND GRAB YOU AND STRIP YOU NAKED AND POINT AT YOU, AND LAUGH AT YOU, AND MAKE YOU WEAR A DUMB HAT AND DANCE FOR THEM AND THEN TAKE YOU TO A BUSY INTERSECTION AND KICK YOU ONTO THE STREET NAKED (except for the HAT), AND TAKE PICTURES OF YOU AND SEND THEM TO YOUR MOTHER.

And

THEY GO BACK TO YOUR HOUSE AND POOP ALL OVER THE YOUR STUFF.

WELL FOLKS,
I'VE GOT SOME NEWS FOR YOU.
THE KNOCKING IS NOT THEM.

THE KNOCKING IS YOU!

And unless you want to GET NAKED AND PUT ON A DUMB HAT AND GO DOWN TO A BUSY INTERSECTION And take SOME PICTURES OF YOURSELF TO SEND TO YOUR MOM THEN HEAD BACK TO YOUR PLACE TO POOP ON STUFF, As some kind of CREATIVE EXPRESSION (Which I TOTALLY SUPPORT),

YOU MAY AS WILL ANSWER THE DOOR.
IT 'S JUST YOU.
YOU JUST WANTS TO BE WITH YOU.

YOU MISSES YOU.
YOU IS LONELY.
YOU JUST WANTS TO PART OF YOUR LIFE.
IT'S THE REAL YOU.

THE HAPPY, SUCCESSFUL, LOVING, HEALTHY, PEACEFUL YOU.

LET YOURSELF IN.

YOU'RE GOING TO MEET YOU ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.

DON'T MAKE YOU BRING OUT THE MEDIEVAL BATTERING RAM.

OPEN THE DOOR.
YOU IS YOU!
WHAT YOUR LOOKING FOR YOU'RE LOOKING WITH.
I AM, CLAM.

Posted by clamlynch at 6:48 PM