Clam Lynch - Cut the Crap

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March 22, 2007

I AM PRETTY EXCITED ABOUT MUSTARD!

“….if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move;”
Matthew 17:20

DEAR FRIENDS,

I AM so excited about my mustard seeds of FAITH. and although they are still in the DARK DARK soil they will be breaking through the ground any day now with all this sunny sunshine and wet, wet rain. And although the rain has mostly been TEARS and the sunshine has been the result of my CAR EXPLODING and having to walk everywhere, IT MAKES NO NEVER MIND.

Cause it's still WORKING.

AND AS SOON AS THEM GOSH DANG SEEDS BURST INTO THIS OUTSIDE WORLD, I AM TOTALLY GOING TO START LEVELING MOUNTAINS!!

The MOUNTAIN OF DEBT!
The MOUNTAIN OF DIRTY LAUNDRY!
The MOUNTAIN OF ANGER AND BRAIN STRAIN
The MOUNTAIN OF LONELINESS AND CONFUSION!!

I AM going to leave one mountain top in tact cause I want to climb it and get a REAL LOOK AT LIFE FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOP instead of the valley . I AM SICK OF THE VALLEY, BEING ALL LOW AND SUCH.

AND THAT CLIMB SHOULD BE PRETTY EASY, NOW THAT MY BURDENS HAVE BEEN LIFTED. I AM GOING TO CLIMB THAT MOUNTAIN AND LOOK AROUND AT ALL THE OTHER DESTROYED BAD MOUNTAINS AND YELL SOMETHING CRAZY LIKE:

BLEEP, BLOOP, ZIPPELLY ,ZABALLY, ZOOM!!!!

THEN I AM GOING TO PEE ON SOMETHING AND MARK MY TERRITORY.

THEN I AM GOING TO PLANT A FLAG, EAT SOMETHING, TAKE A NAP, AND JUST HANG OUT FOR AWHILE.

IF YOU OR ANYONE YOU KNOW HAS A MUSTARD SEED OF FAITH, LETS ALL GET TOGETHER OR SOMETHING?

LET’S GO FOR A HIKE?

Not right now though cause I AM having trouble with my brain WHO DOESN’T SEEM TO TRUST THIS WHOLE "MUSTARD THING"

SO first things first:

I AM TRYING TO GET MY HEART AND MY GUT TO TEAM UP ON MY BRAIN AND KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO HIM.

BLESS YOU FOLKS.

LOVE,
CLAM THE MUSTARDMAN.

Posted by clamlynch at 11:47 AM