Clam Lynch - Cut the Crap

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June 22, 2007

KEEP IT MOVING BUSTER.

I LOVE.

PLAIN AND SIMPLE.

I HEART MANY THINGS.

THOUGH I MUST BE HONEST HERE DEAR READER, SOMETIMES WHEN I SEND MY LOVE VIBE OUT INTO THE WORLD IT JUST KIND OF RUNS AROUND IN MY HEAD, LOOKING FOR AN OPENING TO COME OUT OF UNTIL THE POOR LITTLE GUY JUST GIVES UP AND SHRUGS IT'S LITTLE SHOULDERS AND GOES BACK TO ITS ROOM AND PATIENTLY WAITS FOR ME TO CALL IT UP AGAIN.

FOLKS, THAT’S BECAUSE THAT NASTY OL' FEAR VIBE AND HIS GANG OF NAUGHTY FRIENDS ARE OFTEN BLOCKING ALL THE EXITS. TELLING THE LOVE VIBE, "WHERE THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOUR GOING. NOBODY WANTS YOU OUT THERE; THEY'LL JUST HURT YOU AND LAUGH AT YOU AND PUNCH YOU IN THE THROAT, AND MAKE US ALL LOOK WEAK AND POLLYANNAISH. WE’RE NOT LETTING ANY LOVE OUT UNTIL WE GET WHAT WE WANT AND WE NEED MORE MONEY, A CAR, A BETTER HOUSE, MORE ROMANCE, MORE SECURITY, MORE PAIN RELIEVER, AND SOME HEALTH INSURANCE. UNTIL WE GET THOSE THINGS, YOU’RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE MISTER! SO GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM WITH YOUR FUZZY LITTLE HAPPINESS AND JOY FRIENDS AND WE'LL TELL YOU GUYS WHEN YOU CAN COME OUT. NOW SCRAM!”

THAT’S WHEN I HAVE TO GO IN THERE (MY MIND) AND HAVE A SIT DOWN WITH THOSE LITTLE TROUBLE MAKERS. I START MY TALK BY THANKING THEM FOR TRYING TO PROTECT ME AND ALL THE HARD WORK THEY DO TO KEEP MY EGO SAFE AND STRONG. THEN I BLESS THEM (WHICH THEY HATE) AND I TELL THEM THEY HAVE DONE ME A GREAT SERVICE, BY CREATING SO MUCH PAIN AND SEPARATION FROM MY GOOD, FROM MY SOURCE, FROM MY TRUE NATURE. BY ATTRACTING MORE OF WHAT THEY ARE PUTTING OUT, THEY HAVE PUT ME IN A STATE OF ABSOLUTE SURRENDER.

THEN I WALK AWAY.

THIS REALLY FREAKS THEM OUT CAUSE THEY ARE TOTALLY INTO ATTENTION. THEY START YELLING AND CRYING AND TRYING TO SHOW ME THEIR LISTS AND CHARTS PLEADING THEIR CASE SAYING:

"LOOK AT THE PAST"

"LOOK AT THE STATE OF THE WORLD"

"LOOK AT THE DARK FUTURE"

"LOOK AT THESE BILLS"

"LOOK AT THE FACTS, THE LOGIC, THE TRUTH! COME ON, ADMIT IT! THIS IS A BAD LIFE!"

"LOOK AT THAT PILE OF DIRTY UNDERWEAR AND THEM DIRTY DISHES AND ALL THE STUFF WE’VE GOT TO GET DONE, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!"

BUT I JUST KEEP WALKING.

THEY THEN JUST PACK UP THEIR SHIT AND MOPE AWAY YELLING OUT, "WELL WE'LL BE OVER THERE IN THE CORNER IF YOU NEED US".

BUT I DON’T REPLY.

INSTEAD I GO AND TELL LOVE AND HIS SWEET LITTLE FRIENDS THEY CAN COME OUT NOW, WHICH TAKES A LITTLE COAXING CAUSE THEIR USUALLY KINDA TRAUMATIZED.

BUT THEY FINALLY DO COME OUT AND GO OUTSIDE AND PARTY WITH THEIR FRIENDS AND BRING THEIR NEW FRIENDS BACK TO MY PLACE/MIND AND JUST HAVE A GOOD OL' TIME.

SOMETIMES I CAN HEAR MR. FEAR AND HIS FRIENDS GRUMBLING AND MAKING FUN OF THE HAPPY PARTY SAYING, “WAIT TILL THE EGO GETS BACK HERE, HE'LL KICK ALL THOSE FLUFFY FREAKS ASSES!!!”

BUT I JUST CLOSE MY EYES AND GO BACK TO THE PARTY AND THEN GO WASH SOME UNDERWEAR.

JOIN THE PARTY.

YOUR ON THE GUEST LIST.

V.I.P.

YOU, ME, US.

TRULY-OOLY,

CLAM

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Posted by clamlynch at 5:10 AM