Clam Lynch - Cut the Crap

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May 12, 2008

I AM GLAD I AM NOT A TOILET.

FOLKS, the other day, while I was leading a CUT THE CRAP JR. (for kids) seminar at a local playground, one of the children said something to me that has forever changed my life.

He asked me:

"YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST JOB IN THE WORLD WOULD BE?"

To which I replied:

"BEING YOUR PARENT?
OH...HEY NOW, I'M JUST KIDDING LITTLE JOHNNY. GO ON, PLEASE TELL ME—WHAT WOULD BE THE WORST JOB IN THE WORLD?"

To which he replied:

"BEING A TOILET."

WOW! OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES.

HOW TRUE, HOW REAL, HOW POWERFUL!

AND PEOPLE, IT REALLY PUTS THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE.

THINK ABOUT IT FOR A MINUTE—
WHAT WOULD THAT BE LIKE?
IF THAT WAS YOUR JOB: TO BE A TOILET.

MAN!

THE "NOT GOOD" POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS.

GRATITUDE IS WHAT COMES TO MIND.
GRATITUDE AND COMPASSION FOR TOILETS.

LET'S BUILD FROM THERE.

YOUR JOB (MOST LIKELY) IS NOT BEING A TOILET.
AND ALTHOUGH I KNOW SOME OF YOU ARE SAYING YOUR JOB/LIFE HAS MANY
TOILET-LIKE QUALITIES,

THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

NO MATTER HOW YOU FEEL (METAPHORICALLY). YOU'RE NOT AN ACTUAL TOILET.

AND THANK GOD FOR THAT.

MAYBE THAT COULD BE A LITTLE AFFIRMATION FOR SOME OF YOU.

AT LEAST I'M NOT A TOILET.
AT LEAST I'M NOT A TOILET.
AT LEAST I'M NOT A TOILET.

I AM DEFINITELY NOT A TOILET.

I AM A HAPPY, HEALTHY, SUCCESSFUL, CARING, SHARING, ABUNDANT LOVING PERSON.

AND SO ARE YOU.

IF YOU WANT.

IT'S ALL IN YOUR MIND.

HEY ! THAT IS A GREAT NEW MEDITATION TOOL.

SEE IN YOUR MIND'S EYE A GIANT TOILET.

NOW SEE IT FILLING UP WITH ALL THOSE BAD THOUGHTS YOU HAVE ABOUT YOURSELF AND OTHERS.

NOW....FLUSH.

ALL GONE.

DON'T FORGET TO JIGGLE THE HANDLE.

THANK YOU LITTLE JOHNNY.
THANK YOU GOOD PEOPLE,
AND THANK LIFE!

BLESS YOU(S).

Posted by clamlynch at 10:25 AM