Clam Lynch - Cut the Crap

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May 5, 2008

WATCH OUT FOR JOY-BUMPS!

Folks, Life has installed its very own INNER-TRAFFIC CONTROLS.

Along with CROSSWALKS and STREETLIGHTS (or STRESSLIGHTS),

IT HAS GIVEN YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING I LIKE TO CALL JOY-BUMPS.

Let me explain.
JOY-BUMPS seem like a real pain in the ass when you're cruising down the roadway to success.
BUT THAT ASS PAIN IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS!

JOY-BUMPS are here so that you slow it down and take in what's around you.

IF A SUCCESSFUL LIFE MEANS A BALLS-OUT, PEDAL-TO-THE-METAL RACE TO AN EXPLOSIVE CRASH, what would be so enjoyable about that?

IT WOULD MAKE YOUR SUCCESSFUL LIFE MEANINGLESS AND ALSO CREATE A HORRIBLE TRAFFIC JAM/SIG ALERT
FOR THE REST OF US.

JOY-BUMPS ARE ALSO THERE SO YOU DON'T RUN OVER HAPPINESS
AND KILL IT.

If you come across a JOY-BUMP.
STOP YOUR MENTAL RACING, AND LOOK AROUND.

CHANCES ARE YOU'LL SEE A SWEET PUDGY LITTLE BOY NAMED HAPPINESS with his brothers JOY and KINDNESS Playing with
their little ball by the side of the road.

MAYBE you will see their sweet little one-eyed friend FAITH and her BIG sister ABUNDANCE.
And maybe there will be others ?
YOUR MIND MIGHT START RACING!
Saying to you:

"There's too many of them, they're so strange-looking, I think that little one has a KNIFE!"

"I'M GETTING BACK IN MY RACING MINDCAR AND GETTING THE HELL OUTTA HERE!"

AND PEOPLE, THAT WOULD BE A DAMN SHAME.

'Cause those little folks need your attention.
They want to play with you.
They don't Carry knives or firearms!
They want to come with you on your road trip.

AND BELIEVE YOU ME, YOU'RE GOING TO BE VERY GLAD YOU BROUGHT THEM.
BECAUSE THE TRIP CAN BE VERY LONG.
AND I KNOW FROM EXPERIENCE THAT IT CAN GET VERY LONELY.
With the Talking to yourself, fighting with yourself, maybe even smacking yourself over the head with a bottle.

Don't travel alone.
Bring the kids!
They belong to you.
Don't be a spiritual deadbeat DAD/MOM!

ENJOY THE COMPANY!

I BRAKE FOR HAPPINESS.

Posted by clamlynch at 11:45 AM