Clam Lynch - Cut the Crap

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April 14, 2009

INNER-ROBOT

Let me ask you this question: Have you ever seen a robot walking down the street crying?

Have you ever gotten a late night phone call from a robot complaining about how bad his life is going?

NO! OF COURSE NOT.

Robots are not like me or you.
They don't get sad or feel rejected or fearful.

When i first came up with my dynamic INNER- ROBOT technique it was at the end of a particularly HARSH crying jag which consisted of much naked crying, weeping AND sobbing. as i was starting to come out of it and was looking for some underwear i noticed one of my toy robots just staring at me with his blank robot expression and cold lifeless robot eyes. i blew my nose and screamed "I WISH I WAS LIKE YOU MR. X -43!! I HATE YOU! YOU SELFISH LITTLE METAL JACKASS! WHY DONT YOU GO JOIN THE NEW STUPID ROBOT ARMY! THEY'RE RECRUITING JERKS LIKE YOU! HERE'S SOME BUS MONEY!" ,Which i threw at him with my opposite hand, like a small 4 year old girl might do.

Once i stopped screaming at the robot, i realized i was on to something:
ROBOT POWER!

In my seminars i explain how to place a small imaginary robot inside of your MIND, that you can go to in times of trouble.
20 to 50 people are already using this tool and by Sept. i'm sure it will be more like
230 or maybe even 535. don't be left out. "GO TO THE ROBOT!"

Posted by clamlynch at 10:08 PM

April 1, 2009

I FORGOTTED

Folks imagine my embarrassment when I realized I forgot to post /publish my last blog-a-log entry which stated, "I was going to take a vow of silence and also a dramatic cut back in my food consumption, if I didn’t receive a check for the amount of $15,750.98 dollars from some sponsor or fancy pants highfalutin big wig of some major company"

Well as I sat locked in my home, silently waiting for the mailman and slightly hungry; to be honest with you I got a little bored and went for a walk. Now people let me tell you a little something about going on a little walk. First off if you decide to go on a little walk you should stick with a plan or time frame for said walk. Also you should have at least a general idea where you’re going to walk to.

Because that is EXACTLY WHAT I DID NOT DO.

I went off all silent and hungry and loosy goosy, aimlessly wandering into the woods and I learned a few things:

1. If you’re on any type of medication and you just take off for god knows where, you SHOULD BRING YOUR MEDICATION WITH YOU.

2. If you wear glasses and have night blindness with out them, then WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU LEAVE THEM AT HOME? ESPECIALLY WHEN YOUR SPONTANEOUS ILL PLAN WALK STARTS AT 7:25 PM!!

3. Maybe bring your wallet with some money in it and maybe some form of I.D.

There are so many other lessons in this tale, like wearing shoes, eating some food before you leave or perhaps bring a snack? A jacket? A map? OH MY GOODNESS GRANNY! The lists goes on and on.

Because folks , I DO NOT what happened to ME , to happen to YOU.
And that's called helping others and it feels GREAT!

I’m not going to go into too much detail because it would take too many WORDS, (Maybe I will put out a little pamphlet or something?) but lets just say after wandering in the woods aimlessly for a couple of days I was finally rescued by a group of wee folks led by a wizard,(which actually turn out to be several forest rangers and a state trooper) and after a short stay in the county hospitals “quiet room" I was returned home .

The experience has had a profound effect on me and now I’m more focused and motivated to HELPING OTHERS, with or without $15,750.98 dollars. Because something happening to me out there as I was sitting on a rock crying and eating some grass. It was a voice and it said, "You are on the right path , just stick with it and don’t give up". It also said, "Stop eating that grass there's a whole field of blueberries right behind you".

So I AM back.
Walking on my friends.
Walk on.
DO NOT LOOK BACK IN anger.
Blessings and stuff.

LoveALL Clam

Posted by clamlynch at 9:30 PM