April 29, 2010

IF I HELD A MIRROR UP TO YOUR MIRROR WHAT WOULD I/YOU SEE?

HECK, I DON’T KNOW? I AM NOT A MIRROROLOGIST PEOPLE, JEEEZ LOUWEEZE!!

BUT WHAT I DO KNOW IS THIS.

PEOPLE JUST SEEM TO APPEAR IN YOUR LIFE AND THEY SAY WORDS AND STATE THEIR OPINIONS. SOMETIMES THESE WORDS ARE GOOD AND HELPFUL AND COME FROM A PLACE OF LOVE. SOMETIMES THESE OPINIONS COME FROM AN OPEN HEART AND ARE GIVEN AS SHARED EXPERIENCE OR A HELPFUL/PRACTICAL SUGGESTION.

NOW SOME FOLKS SAY THESE PEOPLE COME TO US TO BE OUR MIRRORS, TO SHOW US THINGS WE MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO SEE IN OURSELVES, TEACH US THINGS WE MIGHT NEED TO LEARN IN THIS THING CALLED LIFE.

I SAY YAY, YAY, TO THAT.

BUT SOMETIMES THEY ARE NOT AND I SAY THAT WITH A STRONG, NAY, NAY.

SOMETIMES THE WORDS THAT COME OUT OF THESE FOLKS ARE BAD WORDS AND THEIR OPINIONS ARE EVEN WORSE.

THEIR WORDS COME FROM A PLACE OF PAIN, OF HURT OF THEIR OWN FEARS AND DOUBTS. THEIR OPINIONS ARE OFTEN BASED IN WHAT THEY OR THEIR EGOS OR THEIR PAIN OR WHATEVER, NEEDS TO BRING OTHERS DOWN AND NOT DO THE EXACT THING THEY ARE TELLING OTHER THAT THEY SHOULD DO THEMSELVES.

BUT HERE’S THE GOOD NEWS!!

BOTH TYPES ARE GOOD.
YES YOU HEARD/READ ME RIGHT.
GOOD.

BOTH ARE GOOD WAYS FOR YOU TO LOOK INSIDE AND FIND YOUR OWN TRUTH.

NOW WHEN I SAY "LOOK INSIDE" I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT STICKING A KNIFE INTO YOUR STOMACH AND CUTTING A LARGE CIRCLE INTO YOURSELF AND LOOKING AT IT AS YOU TAKE YOUR LAST FEW BREATHS.

ALTHOUGH SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE DOING JUST THAT AFTER TALKING TO CERTAIN PEOPLE OR SHOULD I SAY:
"TALKED TO" BY CERTAIN PEOPLE.

OR MAYBE:
"YELLED AT AND BELITTLED AND ACCUSED AND SCOLDED BY CERTAIN UNNAMED PEOPLE"

ANYHOOT, WHERE WAS/AM I?

OH YEAH.
FRIENDS, I AM NOT TELLING YOU WHAT TO THINK OR DO. I AM JUST THINKING/TYPING OUT LOUD. I AM CONTEMPLATING, WHY?

I AM NOT ASKING YOU, WHY? I AM JUST ASKING MYSELF, WHY?

IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, ISN’T IT!!
WELL I THINK THAT’S VERY SELFISH!!

SEE FOLKS THAT IS A PERFECT EXAMPLE. TELLING YOU IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT YOU WHEN I AM BEING ALL ABOUT ME.

IT'S LIKE THAT LITTLE VOICE IN MY HEAD. THAT SMALL SCARED SELF THAT SAYS THINGS TO ME ...WELL NOT OUT LOUD BUT JUST IN MY HEAD. IT SAYS THING LIKE:
"THAT WAS A GREAT MEETING, NOW CAN YOU LEND ME TWENTY THOUSAND DOLLARS YOU RICH BASTARD! I NEED TO BUY SOME SHIT, LIKE FOOD, A CAR, HEALTH INSURANCE, AND CRAZY SHIT LIKE THAT."

OR

"THANKS FOR BAGGING MY GROCERIES CAN WE GO SOMEWHERE AND HAVE SOME HOT CRAZY SEX NOW? "

OR EVEN

"THANKS FOR TELLING ME HOW I’VE GOT TO LIVE MY LIFE, CAN I STICK THIS FORK IN YOUR EYE NOW?"

BUT THOSE ARE JUST PASSING THOUGHTS AND I JUST SMILE AND LET THEM DRIFT BY.

PEOPLE COME INTO OUR LIVES FOR A REASON.
FOR US TO LEARN.
FOR US TO SEE.
FOR US TO HAVE COMPASSION FOR THEIR SUFFERING AS WELL AS OUR OWN.

SO LET’S TRY NOT TO REACT TO OUTSIDE PEOPLES WORDS AND OPINIONS AND JUST ASK OURSELVES, WHAT CAN WE LEARN FROM THEM. LET’S TRY NOT TO HIT ANYONE WITH A HEAVY OBJECT, ESPECIALLY YOURSELF. LET’S GO DEEP AND FIGURE OUT WHAT’S RIGHT FOR ME/YOU.

THAT’S WHAT I AM DOING AND THAT’S WHAT YOU SHOULD DO!!

SORRY, THERE I GO AGAIN.

I DON’T WANT TO SHOULD ON ANYONE.

I LOVE.

ME, CLAM

http://www.clamlynch.com/blog

Posted by clamlynch at 6:29 AM

April 27, 2010

All this IRRITATION has PRODUCED A PEARL (OF WISDOM).

FIRST OFF FOLKS, DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ABOUT CLAMS NOT BEING ABLE TO PRODUCE PEARLS (IN THE REAL WORLD) BECAUSE THEY DO! Just GOOGLE-OOGLE IT! AND YOU WILL SEE.

BUT that's not even what I'M talking about anyway.
WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT IS THE REALIZATION THAT ALL THE DISCOMFORT, HEARTACHE,
DARKNESS, DEPRESSION, DISAPPOINTMENT, LONELINESS, AND OTHER "IRRITANTS"
WERE NOT FOR NOTHING.

WHAT THEY HAVE DONE IS WORKED TOGETHER PERFECTLY TO PRODUCE A LOVELY PEARL.

AND I AM NOT QUESTIONING IT.

LIKE TODAY FOR EXAMPLE:
I WAS SLAPPED ACROSS THE FACE SEVERAL TIMES.
I WAS RIDICULED.
I WAS PUSHED TO TEARS BY JUDGMENT AND CRITICISMS.
AND ALSO FORCED TO EAT AND DO A COUPLE OF THINGS THAT MADE ME FEEL VERY ASHAMED.
YES FOLKS, AND HERE'S THE PEARL.

ALL THIS HAPPENED WHILE I WAS SETTING IN MY APARTMENT ALONE! IN MY UNDERWEAR!

OH, PEARL OF WISDOM!

SWEET, SWEET PEARL!

I SEE NOW.

I MUST HELP PEOPLE!

I MUST GET OUT OF THE HOUSE, GET ON THE BUS, THE PHONE, GO SOMEWHERE, DO SOMETHING!
TRY TO HELP OTHERS, SO MY MIND CAN'T GET ME AGAIN AND THROW ME BACK IN THE "TRICK BAG".

MY PEARL IS YOUR PEARL.
LET ME HELP YOU.
FOR MY SAKE AND YOURS!
ITS A WIN-WIN SITUATION.

I AM SEMI-SUPER-SUCCESSFUL AND HAVE A WONDERFUL-ISH DYNAMIC PROGRAM THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!...MAYBE...maybe not.

BUT IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT I AM NOT LEFT ALONE FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME.

CAUSE WHEN I'M NOT HELPING, I'M HURTING!

DON'T HURT ME.

I AM HERE FOR YOU.

Posted by clamlynch at 9:26 AM

April 22, 2010

Your overwhelming response to my PROGRAM is creating some kind of crazy BLOG-A-LOG-JAM!

MAN O MAN !
You folks are NUTS!!!
I mean nuts like CRAZY people, not like the things people nibble on.

BUT this is good! 'Cause your overwhelming response tells me I AM on track.
YOU folks need HELP, and SO DO I !!

I AM here for US !!

LET'S do this and LET'S make a better life for you/me!

SIDE-NOTE:
Your "suggestions" are interesting, but if they actually WORKED i would be joining YOUR program...i'm just saying.
NOT to be rude, but come on.

I HUG YOU .

Posted by clamlynch at 8:30 PM

April 20, 2010

I FORGOTTED

Folks imagine my embarrassment when I realized I forgot to post /publish my last blog-a-log entry which stated, "I was going to take a vow of silence and also a dramatic cut back in my food consumption, if I didn’t receive a check for the amount of $15,750.98 dollars from some sponsor or fancy pants highfalutin big wig of some major company"

Well as I sat locked in my home, silently waiting for the mailman and semi- slightly hungry, till I got a little bored and decided to go for a little walk. Now people let me tell you a little something about going on a little walk. First off if you decide to go on a little walk you should stick with a plan or time frame for said walk. Also you should have at least a general idea where you’re going to walk to.

Because that is EXACTLY WHAT I DID NOT DO.

I went off all silent and hungry and loosy goosy, aimlessly wandering into the woods and I learned a few things:

1. If you’re on any type of medication and you just take off for god knows where, you SHOULD BRING YOUR MEDICATION WITH YOU.

2. If you wear glasses and have night blindness with out them, then WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU LEAVE THEM AT HOME? ESPECIALLY WHEN YOUR SPONTANEOUS, ILL CONCEIVED PLANNED, WALK STARTS AT 7:25 PM!!

3. Maybe bring your wallet with some money in it and maybe some form of I.D.

There are so many other lessons in this tale, like wearing shoes, eating some food before you leave or perhaps bring a snack? A jacket? A map? OH MY GOODNESS GRANNY! The lists goes on and on.

Because folks , I DO NOT what happened to ME , to happen to YOU.
And that's called helping others and it feels GREAT!

I’m not going to go into too much detail because it would take too many WORDS, (Maybe I will put out a little pamphlet or something?) but lets just say after wandering in the woods aimlessly for a couple of days I was finally rescued by a group of wee folks led by a wizard,(which actually turn out to be several forest rangers and a state trooper) and after a short stay in the county hospitals “quiet room" I was returned home .

The experience has had a profound effect on me and now I’m more focused and motivated to HELPING OTHERS, with or without $15,750.98 dollars. Because something happening to me out there as I was sitting on a rock crying and eating some grass. It was a voice and it said, "You are on the right path , just stick with it and don’t give up". It also said, "Stop eating that grass there's a whole field of blueberries right behind you".

So I AM back.
Walking on my friends.
Walk on.
DO NOT LOOK BACK IN anger.
Blessings and stuff.

LoveALL Clam

Posted by clamlynch at 9:30 PM

April 12, 2010

I've found a cure for BEAVER FEVER.....SOAPY PUPPIES!!

That's right: another official BREAKTHROUGH by yours truly.

While on my adventure to the deep woods of Maine, I contracted what the locals call BEAVER FEVER.
Although it did not involve any BEAVER, it did involve a very high temperature, hallucination, sweating, and wet underwear.

Now folks, it was touch and go there for a day or two, but I was able to get through it and heal myself by visualizing
a SOAPY PUPPY in my mind's eye. And people, let me tell ya: that adorable little fella got me through the worst of it.

I AM sure that if this technique could get me through something as serious as the BF, it will surely work on any problem that comes down your pike.

TRY IT!

Posted by clamlynch at 10:07 PM